This is the tricky part of life – finding the place(s) where you can just be you. Where you don’t have to worry what someone is thinking when you are who you feel like being at that very moment. Do you know what I mean?
I am pretty much “what you see is what you get.” But, recently I’ve noticed times when I’ve not felt safe or comfortable being me. These are usually times when the person I’m with is doing what I’ve been talking about lately — pointing outward, rather than inward. When the person is being judgmental about who I am when really they should be looking at what they don’t like about themselves or who they are in the relationship.
I’ve done this too, of course. I’ve judged people before I’ve known them. I did it this weekend at my meditation class. A woman came in for the class and I immediately thought she was out-of-place … didn’t look like someone who would meditate. I was totally wrong but judged her from the outside and by her initial actions.
I’m frustrated with a situation where someone is doing that to me. I keep changing who I am to try to meet the person because it is clear that who I am is not working for the other person. But, what happens is that when I’m not true or genuine, I end up being frustrated with myself and resentful – and it gets worse, not better. (It also makes me want to run super fast in the other direction!)
The good news is, we can change those situations. We can decide to be our authentic self and act in accord with that. And if someone doesn’t like it – well we can walk or they can too!
Being true to yourself takes courage. It requires you to be introspective, sincere, open and intellectually honest. It does not mean that you are inconsiderate or disrespectful of others. It means that you will not let others define you or make decisions about who you are or what you should be doing.
So today, be true to the very best of you. Be ok with where you are at right now. Live your life consistent with your highest values and dreams. Don’t let anyone tell you that you have to change or be something else. If you need to change, it will occur when you are looking internally – not when someone is pointing a finger at you.
Have a great day!