Sometimes I get tired. Know what I mean? Single mom, three teenagers, working full-time, a house, car, obligations … we all have a billion obligations. And, we all work hard to make sure we leave no stone unturned. But every once in a while I have to admit, it would be nice to have someone take care of me.
Everything we read is how to be independent, be organized, how to get things done. We are told that we can be more efficient, more effective and more engaged in life – all at the same time! We teach our kids to be self-sufficient and go getters. As if that’s the only way.
But, it’s not.
Do we remind our kids that it’s ok to ask for help? That it’s normal to want to have someone take care of them once in a while? Do we tell them that it’s fine to say,”I just need support?”
Earlier this week I got a terrible case of the flu. But, I didn’t really have time to be sick. Who was going to drive kids places, feed them, get my work done? A friend called to say hi and, desperately exhausted I said, I was completely fried. He talked me off the roof, told me how thankful he was that he had called (!!!) and then gave me the best help of all … a quiet night out at my favorite restaurant without having to cook or clean or feed anyone but myself! Friends are amazing!!!
What’s so hard about asking for help? What are we afraid of? Are we scared that we’ll seem less than together? That there will be an imbalance of power? Have we put people in our lives that even want to take the time to pay attention to us?
Someone taught me that asking for help was giving the helper a gift. When you give someone else the opportunity to provide you with a helping hand in some way, you are giving them an opportunity to give back to you in a way that gives them pleasure, increases their level of self-worth and allows them to share themselves with you. Once I came to that realization (likely, while I was on the bathroom floor), my fears of asking for help melted away.
So, I admit that I’m tired. There’s a lot going on in my world right now. And, it was nice to have someone take care of me for once. I also want to remind all of you that you don’t have to do it all, all the time. That it’s ok to ask for a hand, for support, for a night out with friends, for a few hours without kids, a weekend away … whatever. Sometimes, we just can’t take care of one more crisis and we just need someone to take care of us. It’s ok. It’s life. š
Have an amazing weekend!