What’s your story?

What is your life story?  How do you define yourself.  Just for a moment, consider all of the roles you have played so far in your life.   For me, it’s been daughter, sister, wife, student, mom, teacher, lawyer, friend.  These roles have been great, but they are not really who I am.  I’m more than just these labels which create my story.

While this is an issue for us adults (who are constantly working through our s***), I look at my kids and realize that they are often creating their story by the messages they receive from the outside world.  For example, I tell my boys that they should be leaders and to think of themselves that way.  I tell my daughter the same but I also remind her that she is “enough.”

And look at that.  While I’m targeting the message that each kid needs, look at the difference for the girl and the boys.  Why does she not feel “enough?”  Why is that not an issue for the boys?  Environment?  Society? Sad to me.

This is true for us too.  Often we identify ourselves by our current roles – our current environment, not the roles we want to have.  Why didn’t I put “writer” as one of my roles or “motivational speaker?”  I limit my story to what I’ve done thus far and what I’m sure I can do — not what I might want to do in the future — feels too risky!

We tend to limit our life stories by our roles and beliefs about ourselves. How about:  “I’m always going to have a ___ body.”  Or, I’m never going to look like _____.”   Or maybe even, “I’m never going to be successful.”  These beliefs eventually become reality.

Yet, why don’t we (and lets teach our children this) say to ourselves, “Is that belief about me really true? Or is it just a belief that limits who I am and can be?”  Can we separate out the negative stories about ourselves?  And create new, more positive ones?

Here’s a thought: You can take control of your own life story.

Although our stories are largely determined by our life circumstances and our personalities, we do have control over what we tell ourselves about our own lives. Even if we do take our stories from our environment, we are the ones putting the story together, right?

So ask yourself:  What’s my life story?  What am I trying to do here? How can I make my world a better place? How can I find positive from the not-so-positive. And, how am I going to look at my beliefs about who I am, examine and throw away the ones I don’t want, and create the life story I want others to tell about me when I’m gone?

Food for thought.

Have a fantastic weekend!

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