Here’s the funny thing about life: We often run from the things we should remain present for and we remain in the things we should run from. A few months ago a friend said to me, “Stop running, Jess. It’s right in front of you. It’s inside you.”
For a long time, I used running as a way to avoid the things I really needed to focus on. My mom’s diagnosed with brain cancer? I put on my running shoes and go for a two-hour run. My marriage’s falling apart? I run my first marathon. It was my escape. We all have them: Food, alcohol, shopping, sex — maybe better than some other escapes (or not), but escapes nonetheless.
I got tired of running. Not literally, but figuratively. That’s the thing about running, we eventually get tired. We go to therapy. We buy self-help books. We talk to people or sometimes we don’t. We are constantly looking for that “thing.” The change in our life that will give us the internal peace we’re looking for. It’s almost laughable — we’re running from that which is right inside of us.
I’ve decided that staying present at times of conflict (internal and external), those times of insecurity and fear – is the only way to learn from our experiences rather than experiencing Groundhog’s Day over and over again with the same issue, the same person, the same unhappy place.
For a long time I ran from my fears, my instincts and feelings by not leaving a very bad situation. It was running but it didn’t look like running. Know what I mean? During that time, I was even afraid to listen to one of my favorite songs because it scared me that I’d never get there.
I’m not running anymore. It won’t bring me happiness. And, I’m no longer afraid to listen my song because I can finally see that what I need to feel peaceful and happy is right inside me.
I’m not suggesting that every day is magical and wonderful. But, I am saying that if we gave the same love and compassion to ourselves that we give to others, we might not need much else. So, stop running from your fears. You really have only created them yourself. When you really listen to that tape, you’ll realize there’s nothing to run from.
Here’s the thing about internal peace – the path is right in front of you. Don’t run from it, access it.
My song is the link below. I hope you enjoy it. Have an amazing weekend! XOXO