The real truth of my competitiveness came out yesterday in my backyard, and it wasn’t pretty.

We all were trying to get our leaves up these last few days. All I heard on the news was Tuesday was going to be the last “nice”day. My lawn service had been out the day before and took up all my leaves. I was feeling grateful. Yesterday my neighbors (who have a lot of leaves) had their lawn service over. I was glad because I had been cleaning up leaves that were blowing into my yard.

I noticed, as I looked out my back window, that their lawn service people were blowing leaves near our fence, and blowing them into my yard! WTF! I ran to my garage to get my blower (mind you it’s 20 minutes before I am supposed to give a webinar) and run out with it to the fence. As “luck” would have it. The battery was dead. I run back in the house and plug it in. By this point, my crazy ass dog (thinking I’m running because we are playing) grabs my nice shoes which are inside the door and runs outside with them. OMG!

While I chase her around for my shoes (I know, I know, don’t chase!), I let the blower charge for 10 minutes. I’ve now got only 10 minutes before I have to be on the webinar. I grab the blower and a bag and run back out there. It’s the competition of my tiny little blower and their massive ones. We are both walking along the same (but opposite sides) of the fence, blowing leaves. I am trying to get mine in some semblance of a pile, which is totally not working. My dog is now running through the pile, tossing my shoes around and just generally not helping. I pray to g-d that no one was taping me.

For a moment I realize the insanity of it all (me in my dress clothes with a bag, a blower, a lot of leaves and a dog) but I can’t let it go. Eventually, I get a few up, throw them in the bag, grab my shoes and go inside. The dog, runs after me, covered with leaves, walks in the house and shakes them everywhere in my house.

I. Am. Done. I clearly need some therapy (or a bottle of wine).